Are you a smart and caring single woman who is ready for lasting love?
Attract, Keep And Marry The
Love Of Your Life!
It may be a life-long dream, or an idea you’ve finally embraced after years of being single — whatever your situation — I bet somewhere in the depths of your mind you have a nagging, desperate feeling that marriage is never going to happen for you.
I know exactly how you feel.
I was single into my early 50’s — and an expert on being needy and desperate — but I changed all that. I’ve been married to the love of my life now for 15 years and I can help you do the same.
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by Virginia Clark
on May 22, 2012
If you’re a human being you’ve been hurt by the bad behavior of someone you love. No one escapes this painful side of love. It usually shows up in the form of neglect, betrayal or abuse. Most likely, along with the hurt you’ve experienced, you’ve created a story in your mind where you are the victim. If this is the case you haven’t forgiven and probably don’t know how to forgive.
If you’re stuck thinking repeatedly about a past pain it means you are also activating resentment and blame in your mind in the present. This makes you unavailable to fully love anyone new.
You may be asking “How can I forgive someone who has been the source of so much pain for me?”
It is a choice you have to make for yourself and your happiness. You have to get honest with yourself and accept the fact that you too have acted poorly in the past, you too have hurt someone. You have betrayed a trust, crossed a line and you have lied to save yourself.
Do you forgive yourself for your transgressions against others or have you buried them in your mind where you have conveniently forgotten what you’ve done?
Take a moment to look into yourself and why you were cruel. Did something happen to you as child that left you wounded and sad? Do you carry around resentment and feelings of powerlessness? Do you see how your bad behavior had nothing to do with the other person and everything to do with you? You may struggle with how to forgive some one, or maybe [continue reading…]
by Virginia Clark
on May 21, 2012
Online dating is frustrating to say the least. I hear from many of my clients that it’s making them crazy. But of all the Internet dating mistakes you can make, there is one that I see over and over again.
Here’s an example of an email I received from a client:
Virginia, I have been online dating for 3 years on 4 different sites, and I can’t get a date! I give my number when they ask, and then they don’t call 90% of the time. And when they do call, we chat, they say that we will meet this week, and that they will call back, but they never do. With texing or e-mails it’s the same thing, they ask when can we meet, and they never set a day. If I do they always say great, I will call back. They never do. What’s up with that? I am spending so many hours on the internet, or texing those guys, and I never meet any of them. What am I doing wrong? I am so tired of online dating, because for me is a waste of time!
I know for a fact my client is doing everything right, her profile and photos are appealing and she’s a vibrant woman with a lot of interests. So why is this happening to her?
My answer to her and you is that unfortunately there are men on these sites that are not looking for a serious relationship so naturally they respond differently. But even with that being the case, no matter what, you have to [continue reading…]
by Virginia Clark
on May 15, 2012
It’s easy to find dating advice and texting tips on line, and because of the internet you may think the old rules of dating no longer apply. It’s true they’ve changed the way you “meet” a man and start initial contact, but it hasn’t changed the personal effort it takes to create a romantic relationship between two people. It will always require in person, face-to-face contact.
I had a client who was “involved” with a man who was driving her crazy with texts. They went out on their first date and she knew he was the perfect man for her. She was so enchanted by him that she let down her guard and spent the night. She was hooked.
Even though they lived in the same city and went to the same church she rarely saw him. Instead getting together, he lead her into a pattern of exchanging 50 + texts a day.
This didn’t go smoothly. Sometimes he would “disappear” and not text her for a week or so. But he would start up again by texting how much he missed her and thought about her. He’d tease her with pictures of himself saying he was out with the boys and she would send pictures of herself back with her girlfriends.
The truth of their relationship was that they shared hundreds of flirty texts but they only went on 3 dates in 3 months. My client still thought [continue reading…]
by Virginia Clark
on May 8, 2012
Buddy's tongue
This is a picture of my dog, Buddy. When we rescued him he had a mouthful of rotten teeth. The vet had to remove 22 of his 42 teeth. When we brought him home I noticed he looked different. Because of his missing front teeth his tongue now lolls out the side of his mouth most of the time. I found it endearing. This “flaw” made me love him more and gave him a distinction that is uniquely his.
It got me to thinking about women and how we are bombarded from all directions with physical examples of beauty that are just not real. The result is that we can be so damn hard on ourselves and think that to get a man’s attention we have to be perfect. It’s all too easy to be super-conscious of imperfections as if they were the only thing a man sees when he meets you. Women tell me all the time they worry about their looks; that they need to lose weight their skin is bad or that they’re contemplating plastic surgery. These women find it hard to believe they can get a man’s attention being themselves. They feel they have to be a perfect package.
I’ve had personal experience with this. As a teenager my mother offered to pay to get my nose fixed. It was pointed out to me that my face wasn’t right because my nose was “ethnic,” meaning too big. I turned down the offer because the idea of surgery was frightening, but I took to heart what her offer implied. There was something wrong with me that made me unattractive, so much so that surgery was needed.
If that feels familiar and you put yourself down a lot, most likely you learned to judge yourself harshly from one or both of your parents. I’ve talked to many women whose mothers were unrelenting in their judgment and [continue reading…]
Release what’s been standing in the way of finding your special someone.
