What Not To Look For In A Husband

I bet you’ve thought many times about the ideal traits you would like to have in the man you marry.

You may have a vivid picture of what he looks like or what you would like him to do for a living. If you don’t have a picture, you may have just have a feeling of how you want him to be and you don’t even care about the details.

It’s natural for you to have an idealized sense of the man you want to marry but sometimes you can forget that there are more important things to consider when deciding who you want to spend your life with.

You might think you’ve found the man you want to marry and now it’s just a matter of making it happen. But whether you have a specific man in mind or if Mr. Right hasn’t shown up yet, I would like you to take into account the “3 A’s.”

I learned the 3 A’s from a therapist friend of mine many years ago. At the time she told them to me I thought I understood them and I believed I had taken them to heart.

But even though I knew what they were, I still found myself getting involved in relationships with men who embodied one of the three. All these relationships were painful and not one of them lasted.

The 3 A’s can be concidered the deal breakers when it comes to chosing a man you want to marry.  They are:

1.  Addiction (particularly to mind-altering substances)

2.  Abuse (this can be physical or emotional)

3.  Adultery (a man who cheats in a committed relationship)

It may seem obvious that men with these problems are not good husband material but I bet at some time in your life you have been involved with a man that had one of the 3 A’s.

If you see any of these 3 showing up in a man you’re interested in please take note. I have experienced the pain of trying to make each one of these faults OK with a man I was with and it always failed miserably.

There’s no getting around it — to have a quality marriage you need to find a quality man.